Managing Holiday Stress: It’s Alright to Say No!
While we often associate the holidays with happiness and warmth, they can be quite stressful for a lot of people. When they consider all of the obligations that they need to take care of and all the social engagements, it is enough to make their mental health take a nosedive while their stress goes through the roof.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness surveyed to measure what the holidays did to the mental health of respondents and they found:
• 63% found that the holidays put on too much pressure on them.
• 24% of people found that the holidays made their symptoms of mental health worse.
• 68% felt financially stressed
• 57% felt that the holidays put unrealistic expectations on them
If you are one of these people, it may be time to cut back on the work of the holidays and take some time for yourself. And the best way to do that is to learn how to say no.
Many times, we feel under pressure to say yes to all of the invitations that we receive during this time. We don’t want to miss out on the fun or hurt the feelings of someone who took the time to invite us to spend time with them. But all of this can lead to too much work and expectations, which adds to our stress during the holidays.
But how do you say no to other people when you don’t want to be mean or hurt their feelings? Some of the ways you can have the guts to say no include:
Suggest Another Meeting Time
Maybe you would like to take the invitation, but there just isn’t time. You can ask whether it is possible to meet up with them during another time of year. Some families decide to meet up for Thanksgiving over the summer rather than fitting another thing into their busy schedules. Maybe you can invite a family friend over for supper in January or go on a trip with your sisters in March rather than trying to fit it all in.
Delegate
When you are busy during the holidays, it is time to delegate and get others to step in and help as well. Maybe you decide to pick up a few desserts rather than trying to find time to do all the baking this year. Maybe you ask your partner or other family to help out. Saying no and delegating even a few of the tasks on your list could end up saving you a lot of time.
Just Say No
If you have not wanted to do something or show up for an event, then just learn to say no. There is no reason for a long excuse that sounds fake and made up; you don’t even have to come up with an excuse.
Most people will understand if you say that you are busy or have other obligations, especially if you say it nicely and aren’t rude. If you are just too exhausted, just say it. Before you say yes to anything, think about whether you want to go to the event or if you are just worried about hurting their feelings. If the latter is true, then say no without fear.
Think about what you consider obligations. Ask yourself if each of these items is a real obligation or are some things that you took on as obligations that are actually optional. If something is optional you have a choice. Saying no is an option.
The holidays can bring about a good deal of stress for many people, with many events, family gatherings, and more to enjoy. It is easy to get caught up in the events and take on more than you can handle. Learning how to say no can free up your time and allows you to enjoy the holidays.
